In my opinion there’s too much busyness and hustle in our culture now that’s having a detrimental effect - when I think of the people I know who have suffered from being burnt out, it’s staggering. There’s something to be said for slowing down, not overcommitting and making space for what does matter. Good for you.
oh my goodness you are absolutely allowed to spend your weekends doing whatever you want.
your kids will be fine.
in my opinion life is overfull, we all need more time to do the things that replenish us, what ever that is for each person.
my childhood was a decade earlier than yours, but very similar, my parents were homebodies, we weren't a social family, and i was left to organise my own entertainment, living in a small town enabled that, everyone i knew lived in walking distance and everyone kept on eye the kids. not always great as mum usually knew what i was up to before i even got home.
i really have no idea what my parents did, they were just pottering around at home, crafting or creating or we were at our bush block, also pottering around. I loved it.
i'm not social at all, and do wonder if its bad for me, so much about the loneliness epidemic and the health implications etc but i often feel the loneliest when i'm with people.
i wonder when i do get push back from others re my life choices etc is it because it makes them question their own lifestyle?
second to spending your time how you want, is perrmission to change your mind at any time. if its working for you now great, when it stops working then do something different,
I am happiest when I’m home & doing whatever I want to do. I think I learnt to love staying home during Covid. I actually enjoyed not being able to go anywhere. I work in a classroom of 24 - 27 pre primary kids so when I get home I just crave peace & quiet. My weekends are full of reading or crafting. I got sick of the hustle culture, the competition of seeing who could get the most done on their weekends. I am enjoying the slow living & my nervous system is loving it.
I need quiet weekends to recharge. I don’t mind little outings for coffee or walks, or catch ups with close friends. Anything more than that is too much. I love to catch up on my Bravo shows on the weekend with lots of cups of tea - bliss!
I'm a homebody, and an introvert so being home is my comfort zone. I do enjoy occasional outings with my husband but I'm also very content to just be home with a book, some games on the iPad, a good meal and comfy clothes. We are allowed to do nothing and if you're kids aren't complaining then I wouldn't stress over it.
The "weekend" is a nice bit of fiction, isn’t it? In this house, we don't do linear time; we do levels of advocacy and the occasional high-stakes tactical search for a missing shoe!
If I’m "doing stuff," it’s usually because I’m being a legal shield for a tiny human or navigating a soft-play center with the diplomatic poise of a UN envoy.
People ask about "adventuring," but my version of an adventure is successfully documenting a Saturday with the precision of a forensic scientist. If it’s not in the log, did the fun even happen?
And as for "doing nothing"—is that even allowed? Theoretically, yes. In reality, "nothing" is just the three-minute window while the kettle boils before the next mission begins.
Current Status: Living the dream, documenting the dream, and needing a nap from the dream.
I remember in the 80/90's being at home alot. Sometimes the beach, sometimes the shops but mainly my parents were home pottering around. Maybe once a month they would do a bbq with friends or go out for dinner.
I have become very hermity since turning 40. Slowly I have stopped filling my diary with things. I could easily stay home all wknd, not leave once and read my book, nap, cook and potter. This is difficult with a nearly 9 yr old boy who is really good at chilling but also needs a burn some energy at some point during the day. My husband however is the social one. He loves going out and doing things all wknd and would love to go out for dinners, parties, happy hour, lunches, adventures. It has only been in the last 6 months that I have simply just said - pass. And I have finally said that i simply dont want to. So now its a little bit of a battle to find a happy medium between the 2 of us. But to answer your question - I think we are allowed to do whatever the fuck we want lol!
Who would have thought that the two girls working at maccas & drinking & dancing their weekends away at the RSL & Ant Ranch ( LOL!!) would be homebodies in their 40’s!!!!
This 'nothing' you speak of is you tending to your brain and your nervous system. So really, it's everything x
In my opinion there’s too much busyness and hustle in our culture now that’s having a detrimental effect - when I think of the people I know who have suffered from being burnt out, it’s staggering. There’s something to be said for slowing down, not overcommitting and making space for what does matter. Good for you.
Precisely! My new book is all about this; the severe disconnect between our biology and modern reality x
oh my goodness you are absolutely allowed to spend your weekends doing whatever you want.
your kids will be fine.
in my opinion life is overfull, we all need more time to do the things that replenish us, what ever that is for each person.
my childhood was a decade earlier than yours, but very similar, my parents were homebodies, we weren't a social family, and i was left to organise my own entertainment, living in a small town enabled that, everyone i knew lived in walking distance and everyone kept on eye the kids. not always great as mum usually knew what i was up to before i even got home.
i really have no idea what my parents did, they were just pottering around at home, crafting or creating or we were at our bush block, also pottering around. I loved it.
i'm not social at all, and do wonder if its bad for me, so much about the loneliness epidemic and the health implications etc but i often feel the loneliest when i'm with people.
i wonder when i do get push back from others re my life choices etc is it because it makes them question their own lifestyle?
second to spending your time how you want, is perrmission to change your mind at any time. if its working for you now great, when it stops working then do something different,
You’re allowed to fill your cup with whatever will replenish you the best 💕
I am happiest when I’m home & doing whatever I want to do. I think I learnt to love staying home during Covid. I actually enjoyed not being able to go anywhere. I work in a classroom of 24 - 27 pre primary kids so when I get home I just crave peace & quiet. My weekends are full of reading or crafting. I got sick of the hustle culture, the competition of seeing who could get the most done on their weekends. I am enjoying the slow living & my nervous system is loving it.
I need quiet weekends to recharge. I don’t mind little outings for coffee or walks, or catch ups with close friends. Anything more than that is too much. I love to catch up on my Bravo shows on the weekend with lots of cups of tea - bliss!
Remember when we used to tell our parents “I can do what I want!” … well now we can. Yes, we can do absolutely nothing if that’s what we feel like.
These days I’m fine with watching ‘everyone else’ being busy.
I reckon your kids will just look back and remember how their weekends felt, one big blur of comfort. It doesn’t sound like they are missing out, R!
And I’m glad you’re being really heard by your support circle, how good is that xx
I'm a homebody, and an introvert so being home is my comfort zone. I do enjoy occasional outings with my husband but I'm also very content to just be home with a book, some games on the iPad, a good meal and comfy clothes. We are allowed to do nothing and if you're kids aren't complaining then I wouldn't stress over it.
The "weekend" is a nice bit of fiction, isn’t it? In this house, we don't do linear time; we do levels of advocacy and the occasional high-stakes tactical search for a missing shoe!
If I’m "doing stuff," it’s usually because I’m being a legal shield for a tiny human or navigating a soft-play center with the diplomatic poise of a UN envoy.
People ask about "adventuring," but my version of an adventure is successfully documenting a Saturday with the precision of a forensic scientist. If it’s not in the log, did the fun even happen?
And as for "doing nothing"—is that even allowed? Theoretically, yes. In reality, "nothing" is just the three-minute window while the kettle boils before the next mission begins.
Current Status: Living the dream, documenting the dream, and needing a nap from the dream.
Enjoy the 'nothing'.
Till next time...
I could have written this myself! Staying home is the BEST!! 💓
I remember in the 80/90's being at home alot. Sometimes the beach, sometimes the shops but mainly my parents were home pottering around. Maybe once a month they would do a bbq with friends or go out for dinner.
I have become very hermity since turning 40. Slowly I have stopped filling my diary with things. I could easily stay home all wknd, not leave once and read my book, nap, cook and potter. This is difficult with a nearly 9 yr old boy who is really good at chilling but also needs a burn some energy at some point during the day. My husband however is the social one. He loves going out and doing things all wknd and would love to go out for dinners, parties, happy hour, lunches, adventures. It has only been in the last 6 months that I have simply just said - pass. And I have finally said that i simply dont want to. So now its a little bit of a battle to find a happy medium between the 2 of us. But to answer your question - I think we are allowed to do whatever the fuck we want lol!
Who would have thought that the two girls working at maccas & drinking & dancing their weekends away at the RSL & Ant Ranch ( LOL!!) would be homebodies in their 40’s!!!!